Beautiful Lies
by angelwithaphone
Summary: Takes Place after season 9, so spoilers. Dean doesn't want to be a monster. A demon. He would do anything to become human again. Cas has to find a way to get his grace back or he won't survive. And Sam stil can't live the destroying feeling of guilt. Destiel


**Heeeeeey guys!  
I am sooooooo excited to post this here, I realy have no clue if this is good but I figured I'd give it a try!  
This is just the first chapter, so there isn't happening that much, just a little cursing and finding out :)  
I love you 4-ever, if you write reviews and tell me, what you think about it.**

**Yeah, that's all for now, lovelies :)  
I hope you enjoy reading and please remember telling me what you liked or hated!**

**Thanks**

**Kathy**

**XOXO**

* * *

_Goddammit, they can't be serious, _was the first thing Dean thought after opening his eyes.

Had light always been this bright? His head hurt like hell.  
Well, actually, hell was the only fucking place he should be right now.

He tried to identify more details about the place he was in.

And when he recognized _his own damn room in the bunker_, he growled.

_You've got to be kidding me!_

He would kill Sammy. Or Cas. Whoever thought it would be a good idea to bring him back. Again.

He thought this time, he would really die. Get back into hell. Get tortured.

Damn, he'd been really looking forward to it, he'd wanted to get hurt, destroyed. So he wouldn't be able to hurt or destroy anyone's life any longer. Sammy could have lived the life he had always wanted to live, fall in love, get married, get kids or whatever was in his nerd-brother's mind, and Cas could have fixed heaven and helped those fallen angels to find a direction, a purpose, a meaning, eventually.

But, no, that was to much to ask for. Since when did a Winchester have to beg for death? Dammit. He would kill them.

"That's right, squirrel. You got it."

Crowley. Well, still pretty damn near to hell. The demon in the black suit sat in a brown-leather chair in front of him, smiling an honest-to-god relieved smile, exceptionally not looking as arrogant and dickish as usual.

And without thinking about it any longer, Dean _knew_.

"What did you do to me, you sonofabitch?", he snapped, voice surprisingly steady for the fact that his throat felt like Metatron had a dance-party in it. Well, everything was possible.

He tried to get up, but he couldn't. Something was different. He had lost the control over his body.

"There there, darling. Is that how you thank me for bringing you back to life?", the demon said, turning his smile into a smug grin, which made Dean want to rip his head off.

"Oh no, you bastard, if I could move, I'd show you how thankful I am! What did you fucking do, Crowley!", he practically screamed.

"Oh, Dean. How I missed your heart-warming threats. I was really worried for a moment. Thought you wouldn't wake after all, would've broken my heart. I couldn't have stood that loss in my life. But then, I remembered. A Winchester always returns. Just like a boomerang _", the man said in his British accent and giggled. Actually fucking giggled.

Dean felt the anger grow within him, he could feel the blood in his veins speed up, his heart beating harder and also...kind of cold...

All of a sudden, his body found the control, he stood up and grabbed the demon by his collar: "You wanna joke around, coward? But guess what, Crowley, joke's on you! I am going to destroy you for doing whatever the fuck you have done to bring me back and in the end, you are going to _beg me_ to kill you, you understand me, you stupid little shit? You are going to beg me!"

He didn't know where these words came from, he didn't know, why he was full of this aggressive power, but he smiled, because he meant every word he'd said.

"Awww, sweet heart, how I love when you take control like that. And, hey, fancy new eye-color by the way!", the demon grinned again.

Dean thought about asking the brunette about his comment and beating the shit out of him.

He remembered his dad's words.

_Shoot first, ask questions later._

Well, was his old man ever wrong?  
That was when he heard Sammy.

"Dean?"

Sam entered the room and his hopeful look turned happy and glad. Dean let go of Crowley, forgetting everything he said before, heck, everything he _thought _about taking the demon apart and tried to make a step in his baby-brother's direction but his knees gave him and he landed on the floor.

God, he had thought he'd never see him again.

"Sammy!" His brother knelt next to him, hugging him tight, crying, happy. "God, you scared me there, jerk!"  
Dean returned the embrace and huffed a laugh: "As if I could ever leave you alone, Sam. You would never survive, bitch."  
Sam laughed and let Dean go. He looked at Dean and his eyes widened in horror. Sam stared at him, as if he had seen a ghost: " Dean..."  
"Well, since I am really moved by this scene, I am going to leave you two alone now!", the King of Hell said and disappeared.  
"Dammit, Crowley, what have you done?", Sam stood up and screamed.

Dean tried to lift himself up as well, but failed. Where did his strength go?  
"What's wrong, Sammy?", he asked worried. Actually frightened.

"Your eyes, Dean. Your eyes are black.", Sam answered, grabbing a mirror and holding it in front of Dean's face.

And Dean looked at his reflection. No. Not his reflection, the something in front of him. The creature.

The monster. He looked at it.

And he collapsed.

* * *

**Yeah, as I said, not happening much :)**

**And even if I am repeating myself, please write some reviews ;***

**I am going to post another (longer) chapter as soon as I know what you guys think about it :)**

**Soo,**

**Bye :))**

**XOXO**


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